tml is the day that i thought i would be prepared for.. all this while i was so busy plannin wad i was going to do for the next years of my life that i forgot that it will ALL depend on tml.. 2.30pm..

haiz.. i freakin nervous now.. keep tellin my self to keep calm.. so that i won't get gastric pain tml.. luckily tml b4 sch there's this outing.. yah..hope it'll ease my nerves till then.. yepz.. " wad's done is done..wad's done is done..wad's done is done..wad's done is done.." i need that in my head all the time.. even now my hands are turning cold as i type this..

so many questions still left in my head.. i've not decided where i want to go yet.. hope tml will clear things up a little for me. .yepz.. there's always other course rite? i mean.. if u aren't fated to b there.. u're not lor.. yepz.. why worry rite? hehx.. just wished that someone will b there when i get my results.. at least someone to share the happiness OR sadness with..haha.. obviously she won't b there.. she has to get her own results too rite? haha..

ok crap.. i'm real nervous now. .i shalt not talk about O's no more.. destiny lies in fate.. and ur own work brings fate.. ya wadeva..

anyway.. AMI starting soon.. hope thier singing will soothe me a little..yepz..

SEE YA PPL! GOOD LUCK FOR UR RESULTS! AND...


-ALWAYS LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE OF LIFE-

-Group E5
You are found to be a person who loves to love. You prefer emotional decision more then mantel decisions. You consider life just to enjoy; you are the one who is perfect to call FLURTIES.
You love to increase the list of your friends and beloveds.
You have a number of dreams but you never work hard to make your dreams come true which is the biggest drawback in your nature you take everything much lightly.



With in 7 days you will meet a person whom you have never met before that is the person ideal for you.

-If your personal colour is blue, you are introspective and purposeful by nature. You hold conservative beliefs and under stressful conditions, prefer to withdraw into gentler surroundings. You seem to have a lot of control over your passions and desires, but are sensitive to the needs and feelings of others, nonetheless. You are a loyal friend and would prefer to lead a sober life.

ok i spent my day slacking at home.. slept till 11am.. first time can slp so well.. the sun didn't shine in much today.. yeah.. most of the time the sun will glare so much in my face.. even if pull the curtains the wind will blow them open.. then the curtains will be slappin on my face and stuff.. haha..nvm.. point is i slept till rather late today..

yepz then spent the afternoon researching AGAIN on poly courses and entry requirements.. even went to NTU and SMU's websites.. yepz.. dunno if i'm makin the right decision..

yah.. then around 5pm went cycling.. again.. sienz. wanted to cycle pass aj to see if i can catch a glimpse of any1 i noe.. but the traffic light had so many ppl.. so i turned left.. and headed into Ang Mokio ave 10 side.. yepz. since i was there. .thought i would pay Becka a visit.. i reached her house downstairs.. no1 at home..dotz.. haha.. yepz.. it look liked it was gonna rain.. so i rushed back.. yepz.. didn't rain till now.. dotz again.
then later found out the no1 answered the phone at becka's hse coz she was bathing.. dotz again.. haha.

yepz.. came back . ate the same thing i ate for lunch for dinner.. haiz. left overs. yepz.. then watched tv.. came online.. chatted abit.. watched AMI till now.. chat online again.. those ppl online dun seem to b respondin much.. except for 1.. haha..

supposed to go out tml.. go walk walk or sth.. haha.. but seems can't make it.. tight schedule... gotta go give FREE tuition tml at sch..hope she appreciates this..

got asked by my fren to go back to help play my clar for yjc concert.. again.. haiz.. dunno wad to do.. should i go? according to her.. no1's playin my part now.. i dun wanna b irresponsible.. but.. is it a waste of time.. i dunno.. no offence.. but to me i dun feel they are ready to take part in a concert.. i mean.. u are letting ppl pay to watch u lehz.. i noe u ppl work hard.. but the basics are not realli there yet.. need to work on alot of things lor.. intonation especially.. the clashes make my hair stand..

-ok i get it-

ok.. apology excepted..

i think i've officially withdrawn from school already.. yepz.. form ct called today and said i didn't inform her that i wanted to leave sch.. ya.. so anyway.. my mum from a letter to notify her and my father went down personally after lunch to drop her that letter.. yepz. so i think i'm now a free man..

all i have to do now is get my life sorted out.. wad do i want to do.. hmm.. think if i can get into a JC.. it'll have to be Aj.. if it isn't then.. i'll go to a poly.. ngee ann to take mass comm if possible.. or nyp to take media management , again.. if possible..all requires b3 and above for english.. minimum.. i suppose.. haiz.. left onli a few days to decide.. life is tough..

hehe.. any of u watch titus? i remember the phrase.. " LIFE.. is easy. And if yours isn't.. QUIT WHINING!" haha.. watching star world makes my day.. sometimes.. i'm not watching as much TV or soccer as i used to already.. i dunno why.. even though i'm at home most of the time i spent as much time as i can on the pc.. either chattin or finding new songs to sing , play , wadeva.. and ofcoz.. blogging.. haiz.. there are so many things that i want to type in a blog.. but rumours are irritatin.. yepz.. i hate the teasin.. the rumours.. the commotion about stuff that u dun realli want to disclose but just have to. u noe wad i'm sayin? U noe wad i mean????? coz i don't.. haha..hahahaha.. i'm crazy.. mad.. over u.. am i? no idea.

went back to band today.. didn't realli HELp them out much.. just went to see them.. chat with them.. catch up with them.. yeah.. saw a damn irritatin new junior.. sec 1.. childish.. immature.. sec1.. haha.. yepz.. i offered to help sylvia in her a maths.. she said ok.. so now i have to go down to aiss every tuesday and thursday b4 band to coach her or at least give her some help..yeah.. and i'm doing it for free..

Big Fish was a show i actually wanted to watch as well.. just that i totally forgot about it AND the title.. ewan mcgregor's in the film.. not bad.. he can actually act a few types of roles.. obi wan ( star wars ) , christian ( moulin rouge ) and now this.. hmm.. versatile actor.. should get an oscar of something.. haha..

Any1 wanna watch sumtinks gotta give with me? it seems nice.. kinda.. a little weird.. but i dun mind watchin.. it'll be a change to see keanu in a different form.. instead of NEO.. haha..

haiz.. so sienz.. need to sort things out fast.. less than 72 hours to decide my fate. hope i can get to choose an option whether or not to go to poly or JC.. now i have the choice.. my parents agree on both.. hmm.. so now it's just me.. JUST ME AND MY LIFE..

bayern v madrid.. later. 3.30am.. dun think i'll watch.. tired now.. going to slp soon.. yeahz..

-will u complete me?-

in case u didn't know.. time is a precious thing .. especially on weekends..

that's my nick on msn.. if u didn't see it that is.. wanna know why i wrote tt? bcoz i'm freakin pissed.. so far.. everybody that is late at least turns up and goes in the end.. but noooo.. u told me to wait there at 10.15.. i left the house at 10... rushing there incase i was late.. i didn't receive no calls... so i waited.. waited till 10.45.. ya.. i thought we could go.. nonono.. " eh.. i think we finish at 12.. u go first" was the first thing i heard.. WITH who? kevin as usual was late.. he was already gettin out of the house i pressumed.. can't blame him.. he was chattin till 4am for wadeva reason.. but U.. u told me to meet at 10.15.. and i canceled other plans to go out with U ALL.. and wad.. u don't turn up? dun tell me u didn't know about CCA yesterday? even if u did couldn't u just send me an sms in the morning.. dun have to wait till i wake up and walk there then tell me u can't make it rite? MY WHOLE morning is wasted..

at least he has changed abit.. workin life made him a better person.. wad has that jc done to u.

FINe.. i'll put this all behind.. but not until i have my part of the 'fun'..

weekends.. today supposed to be family day for me.. sundays my mum goes dancing.. my brother goes church.. my father goes cyclin.. i don't do anything.. so goin to sentosa on sunday is fine for me this week..

u were like.. so wanna go acjc tml or not?.. u kept askin tt question.. so many times.. since i see u as a gd friend.. i decided to go lor.. i dun even have tix.. and no girls are even going.. YOU wanted to go.. so i went WITH u.. both of u bought tix.. i didn't.. i always thought that it isn't the place u are goin to .. it's the company u're with..

it's time for a taste of ur own medicine.. it isn't the first time.. i admit i was late a number of times as well.. but at least i turn up.. huh.. maybe i can't blame u.. bcoz if it u didn't stay in sch.. u'll probably get kicked out rite.. ha.. there's always other places.. ITE not bad wad..

if it weren't for this blog.. i'll probably spit at ur face when i see it.. that is if i dun receive and apology.. i wonder if u even think that u are in the wrong.. but no.. i'm gonna put a mask and pretend its all ok.. until u read this entry i guess.. then mayb u'll understand..

i want my apology or at least an explanation.

- now i comprehend ur feelings -

haha.. got the green lite from my parents to stop sch.. who cares if yj don't let me withdraw.. haha.. withdraw myself.. pon all the way! haha.. Ai band has grown SOOOO much bigger.. anw.. some ajcians came over today to practise for talent time.. not bad.. got quite talented ppl.. even a girl who hasn't got any back grnd of playin the drums.. she managed to learn tt thing u do in just 2 days.. nono.. less.. bout 3 hrs the most i guess.. cute girl..

william was my primary sch mate.. think he doens't noe me last time.. but i know him.. haha. so he was quite shocked when i told him i knew who he was.. anw.. eng choon was in aj as well.. didn't see him for 4 whole years liaoz.. he didn't change much.. just taller.. haha.

just can't get her off my mind ya.. haha.. nvm.

oh yah.. i went to yj today at around 12.30! haha.. think i can be considered as outsider le.. nvm la.. sch dun acknowledge my withdrawal.. i get student fare on buses and mrt.. not bad wad. haha.. just pon lor..haha..

yepz goin to aj tml at 1pm to help them again.. haha..they better give me a treat after this man.. lend them the house as practice area.. give free drummin lessons.. made sure she could play.. somemore need to put on sch u to get into aj.. risk myself being caught trespassing.. haha.. nvm. it's worth it ..in a sense.. if u noe wad i mean..

anw. i gtg. le.. damn tired.. u jc ppl must all be sleepin rite now! haha..

-few days left..

i'm so bored. pon lessons since i came to school.. now in sch library burning time . i've got gastric pains and i feel like i have diarrhea. feel like going to toilet all the time. haha.. die liao.. i wanna go home after this. maybe can get early leave form or something like that. or maybe i'll just walk out the gate and tell her i've already withdrewn. hope to withdraw by tml.. veri sienz liaoz.. come to sch also no meaning.. today hl , ws, jie en and cindy came to yj to crash.. think they only went for one chem lecture and now waiting for maths lecture in the library also.. haha.. so lame.. pon aj to come yj.. hope i can convince my father asap to let me withdraw from sch.. i dun understand lor.. yesterday at dinner my brother was persuading me to withdraw from ' the stupid school' already.. yah.. ALREADY.. my mum agrees too.. but i've got to let my father sign.. while we were discussing that yesterday he kept quiet so i asked him for his comment.. he said.. up to u lor.. begins with the end in mind... haha.. his fav phrase.. but weirdly that phrase actually gives me some pressure.. am i makin the right choice ? anyway today i found out that nyp has this film and media management thing.. its related to mass comm as well. so i guess if i decided that np is too far away.. i have to go nyp and take it.. yepz.. its a newly launched coursed.. just this year.. nyp is so near my place.. why not rite? its eitehr nyp or np or aj.. i won't ever come back to yj.. the honey moon 3 months are not as relax as it seems.. yj sucks so much my straw feels inferior!haha.. lame.. but i thought of it.. so erm.. still lame.. wad the hell. i'm freakin bored here in yj library.. wanna shit.. think have gastric pain again.. so sienz.. so sienz.. goin home after this.. i decided le..


YJ sucks so much all the straws in the world feels inferior..

another slacky day.. pon sch again.. didn't even tell my parents.. onli told my maid not to wake me up in the morning haha.. yepz.. tml morning goin to sp and np open hse.. hope has arrived! will elaborate further tml.. i veri tired le.. BYEZ..

the thought of u remains in me..

hmm.. hope my missing of lessons won't affect me too much.. i still want to catch up.. but at home.. hate sch. . realli wanna see whether poly is better or not.. heard there is a poly open hse this sat.. maybe i shud go see see.. don't realli noe much about poly life.. but i've been hearing alot about it.. hmm.. anybody interested in goin wif me? haha..

i feel much better stayin at home too.. can do the work at my own time.. no pressure.. it's just me and my passion.. and lots of tit bits.. if i'm interested in it i'll work on it wan.. at my own time.. anyway john's not going tml i pressume.. anyway.. i feel kinda sick too..

oh yah.. cherlynn u asked me my opinion of the gers in our class.. well.. i kinda scared i offend some.. haha.. nvm la hor.. hope they forgive me..

well..

Angelina.. think she's quite a nice person to talk to.. veri approachble also ya.. Tiffany.. think she has quite a unique character.. yepz.. veri erm.. ang moh kwan wan.. so different from the girls in my sch.. haha.. Leh jun.. the 'ghost' of p24.. onli seen her once.. haha.. was expecting the mystery girl to be some chio bu.. haha.. no offense though.. charissa's gone down under le rite? nvr realli knew her.. haven't spoke to her yet.. Natasha seems veri nice too.. always smiling wan.. erm.. think my friend likes her haha. she quite chio la.. sharada erm.. seems veri gd friends with natasha... hehe.. seems nice too.. can see she isn't the dao type.. Ling fang always seems veri stressed.. she's the first girl i talked 2 on the second day i was in sch with p24.. she seems ok but vERi stressed! should ask her to relax... heard she's workin.. maybe that's why she's so tensed.. Marzuka ar.. i've been in the same class as her since sec 3! haha.. she's a nice person to talk to.. she can write pretty well i guess.. she and liza used to top our class in essay writing.. Yvonne is SO pink! she realli takes great effort to showcase her pinkish style.. everything is pink lor... she seems ok la.. chattable.. dunno noe her well enuf i guess..and ofcoz cherlynn.. always has a view on something and never fails to let it out to the world! haha.. kinda brings life to the class? i dunno.. haha.. yepz that's my view of the girls.. oh yah.. all that aside.. is vincent like erm.. has he got problems? he seems er.. how do i put it.. ar.. he kinda gives me the creeps. heh. no offense too.

my mum's askin me to go to sleep bcoz its gettin late and i'm supposed to be in sch tml.. hmm.. well. i AM goin go slp soon.. but for the sch part.. eh.. i'm not so sure.. hehe..

erm.. need a little help with the html.. could some one help? tag me..

do you like the new blog look? hehe.. cool.. it expresses how i realli feel rIGHT NOW..yeah manz.. Sschool is crap! will be back later to edit haha.. i kinda lost my phlogger link.. damn.. nvm.. later will settle that.. er.. haha.. u'all can feel free to tag on the brand new tag-board i just made! give me some new ideas on wad to do and stuff.. question me if u want.. yepz.. try not to insult PLEASE.. my days in yj are depressing enuf..

i feel pretty sucky lately.. can't stand going to school anymore.. can't wake up in the morning to go to a place full of some sucky ppl and commitments u have to make without ur own will.. task are always there for us to accomplish and blah blah blah.. somemore everyday there's this irritatin guy who likes to debate about everything under the sun.. can't stand him.. kevin said something true.. gettin sick of yj's food le.. prawn mee chicken rice.. almost everytime eat the same thing.. the other stalls seems ee.. heck.

i've so much work left to complete.. i seem so er.. can't find the word.. i just hate going to sch.. just hate it.. just hate it.. i just wanna stay at home at use my com maybe find out NEW things .. maybe play more soccer.. maybe get fitter.. maybe go work. i haven't experienced workin life before..

and there's this thing that i feel is missing in me.. dunno wad also.. gf? soccer? band? dunno.. maybe it's just takes time to adjust back to schooling life.. well. . seriously. iT sucks bad.

had a re-match thing with weihong's team on sun.. think most ppl played pretty well.. we held on although benjamin and rodney wasn't there... its gd playing soccer .. it's good to feel the same sense of i dunno hunger? to win.. to be in the same team as the ppl that i noe and trust.. it's the nicest feelin i'vehad so far.. stupid yj.. the band sucks too.. i'm thinkin maybe i should quite and join something w less hrs like prob choir? band now is like 3 times a week and can go up till 8 pm at nite.. think it realli is draining the life out of me.. i've no free time with the band.. but i like this band.. at least i like the members not too bad.. their pretty nice.. the instructor is patient.. but i think mr toh was better.. NoW i realli miss AISS concert BANd! they rock man.. i love all my juniors! well.. most of them. some lesser some more.. haha..

realli feel like shit this few days.. if onli i can decide wad i want to do in future than i can enter poly.. less stress it seems.. and heard its much mroe fun.. but wonder what the change will be like.. haiz.. heard the results of my os comin in 19 feb or seomthing.. or isit 28 feb? dunno.. hope i can get it faster and make my decision soon.. i kinda hate jc life now.. not hearing anything gd about it from others in aj too.. feel like dropping cs.. and takin just 3 a level subs in these temporary 3 mths in yj..

school life sucks.. school life sucks.

i just wanna play soccer. play music. and not go to school.